October 28, 2006

Portal astral para salir del Estado Libre y Asociado (Crónica del día de antes)

Por: Manuel Clavell Carrasquillo en incontinencia

knifelicka smallEscribe Manuel Clavell Carrasquillo
Ilustración de Ethanbeeart

me puse a leer la biblia en el Parque Central, atravesé los charcos de fango de las veredas lapachando, como si quisiera marcar las páginas finas con marrón oscuro. cuando me dispuse a beber agua, recordé mi nombre y me dio asco, vi a las niñas cruzar la calle hacia los brazos de su madre y me di cuenta de que tenían las bocas llenas de galletas. los párpados se me cerraban al unísono (creo) y voltié la vista hacia la derecha. enfoqué el punto luminoso del portal astral que me transportó fuera del Estado Libre Asociado. Bye, Kansas, ese cliché de Dorotea wanna-be dije. terminé la tarea hidratante y hacia allá dirigí mis pasos. atrás dejaba el asunto de las certificaciones de puertorriqueñidad que estaba expidiendo el Departamento de Estado, proyectos de mudanza, estadistas corruptos, ilusiones. en ese instante, se sucedió una serie de imágenes nefastas en mi mente. me vi leyendo un mamotreto inacabable en la biblioteca de la escuela de Derecho, cortándome las uñas, vomitando 14 cervezas, viajando por periodos breves a la isla vecina de Culebra, eructando. acto seguido, llegaron las siluetas de par de frustraciones, unos osos polares en peligro de extinción y la familia de William Elías Amigo, que es postpentecostal y vegetariana. Mari Bras no dejaba de acosarme a pasar de que estaba decidida la salida abrupta: puño alzado, vestido de guayabera blanca y pantalón negro, el viejo líder del partido socialista me convidaba a afirmar mi sentimiento patrio exigiendo la certificación de la ciudadanía puertorriqueña. la boca se me llenó de un sabor agrio. escupí. quise desaparecer, pero no lo hice porque el propósito de la pasión es que lo oculto se vea (Cerati). otra niña llegó a la memoria, de pelo afro, gritona. era una prima lejana. la saludé, no le pregunté por la resolución del pleito de la herencia. eso me acordó que quise pagar mis cuentas por la vía electrónica antes de que las culpas se convirtieran en recargos. quise bailar un poco de reggaetón de Wisín y Yandel antes de que en el canal 2 saliera a predecir el estado del tiempo el reportero meteorólogo y tuviese que cancelar el viaje. quise que me quisiera un amante nuevo, distinto, feo. una vez maté a un puerco y usamos la sangre para rellenarle las tripas con arroz, eso -más el sofrito necesario- se me atravesó en la molleja. una vez comí mierda para complacer a un jefecito que pasaba lista, a los colegas, a las amigas de la infancia. después, justo luego de pasar la página, envié un mensaje de texto y lo contestó Mayra Montero, que tanto los odia, sobre todo aquéllos que desembocan en actos pedófilos. ¿yo sería pedófilo cuando siendo niño tenía relaciones con otros pequeños? creo que no, que eso no me hace pedófilo. quizás embustero, de profesión, de cariño, pero al fin y al cabo, antes o después del umbral astral que tenía de frente, falsetto.

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