January 28, 2006

Derroteros: Del 5to al 8vo Microrrelatos Eróticos Nuestra Señora de las Infidelidades

Por: Manuel Clavell Carrasquillo en micros eróticos II

Por Rolando Revagliatti
Especial para Estruendomudo

Me cuenta mi señora

A mediodía los obreros y los jubilados arrasaban con el menú fijo en el ya derruido barsucho donde él hacía de mozo. Yo iba con frecuencia por mi trabajo, para rellenar planillas, y leer el diario. Ahora es el repartidor de una tintorería. Ayer, casi de noche, fue a mi departamento en misión repartidora. A mi regreso, hoy, después de una gira que me mantuvo alejado por esos caminos polvorientos, me cuenta mi señora, esa falsa e indómita pelirroja suculenta y estéril, que me extrañaba terriblemente, y que el jovencito irrumpió en su anhelo de mí con nuestra colcha lila, y que lo condujo al dormitorio para constatar sobre nuestra cama con baldaquín la correcta limpieza de la colcha, y que una vez situado el pichón de playboy, y asaltado, se entregó a la bacanal que desde mi señora, mi esposa, me estuviera —irremediable, inconteniblemente— dedicada. Se portó bien, muy bien, aseguró; fantasioso e incansable; remató relajada: excelente.

Sé absorber los más impresionantes uppercuts del destino. Pocos, sí, pocos como yo. Este servidor. Estoy hecho de una extraña pasta.

 

Señorita

Sí que tuvo novios la señorita Calistri: cuantiosas simpatías. Pero, a menudo, cuando le atraía el fondo humanitario del candidato, no se sentía conmovida por lo físico o lo facial. Y, si llegado el caso, el pretendiente respondía a mis cánones de presencia varonil, aparecíanle desdibujadas las facetas espirituales. Enamoradísima de Juan Mateo Ovalle, resistía sus ímpetus pasionales, el vigor de sus instintos. La señorita Calistri valoriza sin énfasis: Nadie obtuvo lo que tantos ansiaban. Ella es hoy la fraseología con la que rememora: Yo no carecía de una límpida mirada; Mis atributos no pasaban inadvertidos; Papá vaticinó mi futuro; Me consagré a mis arraigadas convicciones; Destilé coraje en los tiempos duros, en la tiranía; Nunca estimé en Nené sus propensiones afectivas; Es que todo ha sido tan fugaz…

Algún día, próxima a expirar, quizá consigne: En aquella desfloración infausta de mil novecientos cincuenta y uno, otoño, creí morir: repugnante, bajo, indigno: única vez, última vez.

Confieso

En marzo evalué el veraneo de febrero. En junio, en el mismo junio, el crimen. En septiembre me torné sombrío. Y en pleno diciembre treinta y uno, intento recapacitar. En abril le di forma al plan que ejecuté en junio. En septiembre encontraron el cadáver. Que no me agredas, me desconcierta: ella no te era indiferente. Además, te amaba. No toleré que no se quedase conmigo quedándose a mi lado. Se reía. Todos sabían en el barrio. De mí, de mi inocuidad. Habrá un feliz año nuevo. Porque confieso: la estrangulé. Le pegué después de muerta, lo hice. La desnudé y le pegué. Se termina, viejo. Hoy, por fin, me siento equidistante, sincero.

Derroteros

La fresca y pimpante criatura unióse en matrimonio a Feliciatti tres largos años antes de prendarse de Valentina. Con él tuvo gemelos robustos. Dejóse destinar para Feliciatti por su padre, a quien también su esposa había sido destinada por el suegro. De blanco frente al altar, con todos los permisos y plácemes familiares recibidos, sociales y religiosos otorgados, regodeóse por vez primera imaginándose a solas con Feliciatti. Feliciatti, de exactamente el doble de su edad.

Espléndida ella por simple existencia, sin artificios, casi sin poses. Feliciatti, barnizado comerciante en comestibles, en cambio, ampuloso y plagado de latiguillos. Amante ponderable después de todo, lograba estremecerla. Los gemelos, como dije, robustos, nacieron sin dificultad.

El flechazo entre Valentina y la fresca y pimpante criatura prodújose en la fiesta donde descubrieron que la progenitora de Valentina, en su condición de obstétrica, había asistido a la progenitora de la progenitora de los gemelos en el parto en el que vio la luz.

Cuando la obstétrica enviudó, Feliciatti, por despecho, enterado de la incidencia de Valentina en su cónyuge, decide seducir a la obstétrica. Empieza la noche misma del velatorio del marido, y redondea la entusiasmante tarea, semanas después. Valentina y la destinada a Feliciatti festejaron el salpimentado romance.

Cristalizadas perduran más o menos así las cosas. Socios y barnizados comerciantes, habiendo adoptado con naturalidad los latiguillos alocutivos de su padre, los gemelos, hombres de bien, se mantienen indeclinablemente robustos y ampulosos.

Rolando Revagliatti es un escritor argentino experto en micronarrativa y micropoesía. Para (des)conocerlo mejor se puede visitar su espacio en la cibergalaxia.

 

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