September 10, 2005

Nimiedades íntimas

Por: Manuel Clavell Carrasquillo en extranjería, fragilidad

Por Manuel Clavell Carrasquillo
Redacción de Estruendomudo

Robi Rosa va a dar un concierto que ha vendido par de noches en el Centro de Bellas Artes de Santurce. Yo quiero ir, pero me temo que a Robi le dé una de sus famosas rabietas en plena tarima. Que me deje plantado. Enciendo dos velas blancas en la sala para sentarme a fumar y escuchar a Robi. “Los árboles se besan, dice, los escombros de mi vida se deslizan con la lluvia; olvidando a Penélope”. Detesto ir a un concierto de rock melancólico en el Centro de Bellas Artes. Es por el lugar, no por el mood quebrado.

Cuando dicen teatro gay, ¿qué es lo que dicen? Un armario lleno de dragas y plumas, o una vitrina para exponer?

Mima, cantautora del patio en español y en portugués, camina por una calle primaveral de Nueva York. Se encuentra con el olor a café expresso que le llega del Bryant Park. Lo sigue. Pide el expresso, lo endulza, lo saborea y piensa en Río Piedras y en Brazil.

Anoche le toqué una teta a Mayra Santos, musa de la literatura. Estaba en la explanada frente a Bellas Artes, inspeccionaba el balance sobre mi consciencia de las esculturas de Arte Público. ¡Son tan pequeñas!

Hoy hay get together en casa de un actor famoso de mi generación: ha interpretado con igual ímpetu papeles en “Esperando a Godot” y en los anuncios de una conocida casa financiera. Es un Montessori Back To School al que no me voy a dar el lujo de ir [sic.] Soy un looser [sic.].

Visitaré a un amante para conversar esta noche(ayer cené media gallinita del país en salsa de melao que me costó diez dólares). Es rubio; una tentación insoportable. Siempre que lo visito me ofrece vino barato, pero no importa, lo que me seduce es que me hace reír de mi solemnidad monógama y que su barba raspa.

“Peligro y misterio”, dice Robi allá detrás. “Voy cruzando puertas tras de ti, te busco”. “Tu cuerpo, laberinto eterno, peligro y misterio”. Bueno, pues así estoy, con tantas dudas profesionales, con tantos actos de negociación laboral, tantos solicitantes como espejos de mis solicitudes, y, ellas, así tan tranquilas; con tan poca angustia.

“Nueva Orleáns a principios del 94: …yo te lo pido, blanca mujer, que me lleves a tu blanca guarida. Tengo tantas ganas de ti…” y yo fumo
pensando
–no en la ciudad fantasma-
sino en todo eso.

La casa está sucia, “hay un hombre esperando morir”, canta Robi… jode que jode con la depre y uno que debe botar y barrer. Fui impresionado por una entrevistada de Lucía Neuman que participaba en una marcha en La Habana para conmemorar el día de la Virgen del Cobre. Adjunto el texto del calce de foto que consulté en Google: “En El Cobre, a unos 15 kilómetros al oeste de Santiago de Cuba, se encuentra el Santuario Nacional de la Virgen de la Caridad, declarada Patrona de Cuba, en 1916, por El Vaticano. Fue coronada por el Papa Juan Pablo II”. Habrá que echarle agua al piso, es hora de limpiar la casa.

Tengo problemas con mi editor. Enfrentamos un proceso de divorcio. Resulta ridículo que al crítico no se le critique. Resulta que es contraproducente que se le trate no como uno más sino como la amenaza a la autoestima que no es.

“Los corceles oscuros del Jardín, encabritados”. Verso de Miguel Ángel Náter de un libro ("Esta carne proscrita") que voy leyendo cada mes sin tener prisa para terminarlo. No soporto el hard rock de Robi. Nada de lo suyo en español que me suene encabritado.

Vivir en cajones
Vivir de visita

Por José Miguel Curet
Nace en Puerto Rico (más o menos en el 1975).
Tomado del poemario “De visita: simples rutinas”, Los décimos primero, San Juan, 2002.

La gente va prefiriendo vivir de visita
Saltando cajones
Cuadrados, redondos, rectangulares
Sin tubos, sin palos, sin cita
Tocar las puertas de los vecinos
Solapar sus tripas
Entre las tablas de una misma encerrona
También la gente va prefiriendo vivir en cajones
Redondos, maduros y con sus lindos patios
E ir de visita a donde lo conozcan
A sus cajones vecinos
Rectangulares, redondos, cuadrados igual
Nadie tiene miedo a que lo vean con los ojos letrinos
Los ojos amigos, los ojos sin pintar
Salir y promulgar los edictos del odómetro
Y ver y leer los edictos
Y ver de nuevo con ojos de ciempiés
Arrastrando cien nostalgias
No tienen miedo a ver la socavadora
De terrenos escabrosos
A leer la linda estrofa de cohete a propulsión a chorro
Te leí a ti y no a los otros
Tú que viniste a visitarme a mi cajón
Te leí la última estrofa, la verdadera
La última
No pudiste aguantar la respiración adentro
Ni salir del hoyo donde habitas
Leí la última linda, lo seguí con las primeras
Que no entenderán
Cubrí entonces mis piernas con un pantalón
Mis cojones también
Mis herramientas íbíd.
Los proyectos giraron siendo mi rueda que nunca se vacía
Cubrí mis manos que no tienen con quién pelear
No son guantes de boxeo
Los cubrí con guantes impermeables, con eso los cubrí
De esos como que de goma que sirven para limpiar
Y no entra el agua
Me los puse y ni fregué siquiera
Sucumbí las manos para tocar
Cuadrado, redondo, rectangular, la visita, el cajón

2 Responses to ' Nimiedades íntimas '

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  1. on September 12th, 2005 at 9:54 am

    Otro episodio más de los críticos también lloran?

  2. on September 12th, 2005 at 2:48 pm

    “just, get a little closer
    and
    look at me in the eye”
    RDR

    acércate. ummjú. voy a contarte una historieta.

    el dolor insoportable en una uña
    que dobla un cojín que es tomado
    de una esquina
    para sacudir el mueble
    queda perplejo ante la vista de la sala comedor
    un reguero de papeles
    los estantes sin ser aún abarrotados
    la bombilla de la lámpara maravillosa que se funde
    y él
    que aún no me contesta.

    ese fin de semana, la mujer a quien llamo LA DIABLA destila una amargura tal, que todos sus poros se comprimen, y LA DIABLA entera cae presa de la melancolía sin par. mientras tanto, LA OTRA, que es quien os narra esta historia, se mantiene ávida ante la secta que crea El Poeta Ciego y su Profesora Virginia. LA DIABLA adivina todo esto, lo intuye, diríamos, y mueve sus tetitas de un lado a otro, practicando poses que la llevarán a la cúspide de su carrera. en cuanto LA OTRA lo presiente, la llama y se reúnen.

    Mírame a los ojos. ?Para? Para que veas que he nacido con la marca. Mira, mamita, a ponertele críptica a tu madre, sabes mi cielo. Si no te acercas, y miras, detendrás el curso de las cosas, y el destino amelcochado nunca cesará de perseguirte. Pero, mijita, a ti como que te dieron algo, qué tú te bebiste, qué te obligaron a beber, confiesa, CONFIESA. Mírame, cerca, prueba, mírame cerca.

    LA DIABLA se acercó a LA OTRA. tanto que sus pestañas se besaban o se hacían cosquillas una a la otra.

    LA OTRA se horrorizó. LA DIABLA también tenía esa hendidura vertiginosa en lo profundo de su ojo.

    como era recíproco, ambas se perdieron en la pupila de la otra.

    después de esa experiencia, cuentan que las cosas siguieron como si nada, un revolú de papeles y libros, muebles mal acomodados, pintura en la paredes, así, así, y ninguno de los esposos notó diferencia.

    pero ya todo estaba hecho: estaba una fundida con la otra.

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